


Blueberry Hill

by blakefancier



Series: Wanting Series [8]
Category: Captain America (2011)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-07
Updated: 2011-08-07
Packaged: 2017-10-22 07:41:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/235725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blakefancier/pseuds/blakefancier
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Starts right after Interlude. Steve asks the hard questions and Howard does some growing up. But not too much.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Blueberry Hill

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: Discussion of child abuse.

It was only supposed to be a back rub, but exhausted or not, he hadn't seen Steve in four days. That's why the back rub, inevitably, turned into light petting, which turned into heavy petting. In no time, Howard was stretched out on top of Steve and they were rubbing against each other. They both still had their pants on.

"I missed you," Steve said, kneading his ass and breathing harshly.

Howard kissed him. He would have missed Steve if he hadn’t been so busy.

Steve smiled against his mouth and flipped them over. Then Steve deepened the kiss, leaving Howard dizzy and breathless.

“You’re getting good at that,” he said, running a hand along Steve’s jaw.

“I get a lot of practice. My fella can’t get enough of it.” Steve’s face flushed pink.

God, Howard loved it when Steve blushed. “Really? He sounds like bad news.”

“Oh, he is, sir.” Steve nodded and took a deep breath. “Can I show you what he taught me?”

He pretended to think about it, though with his dick drilling into Steve's hip, he knew he wasn’t fooling anybody. “All right then. Show me.”

For an artist, Steve was surprisingly methodical. He started with a kiss—no, that wasn't right. First, Steve nipped Howard's bottom lip, so sharply that it stung. Then, he began a series of long, messy kisses that left Howard flushed and trembling.

"Steve," he whispered.

Steve just smiled and kissed a trail down his throat, lapping briefly at Howard's Adam's apple. Howard's breath hitched in his throat and he tangled his fingers into Steve's hair.

Steve took it slow, lips brushing over Howard's chest, light as a feather, tongue and teeth playing with his nipples until it almost hurt, then slowly licking a path down his sternum. Howard didn't think he could stand it much longer and he urged Steve lower.

Of course, Steve was never one to listen to others once he had a course of action laid out. He batted Howard's hands away and sucked a path downward. He circled Howard's belly button with his finger, before dipping into it with his tongue and swirling.

Howard gripped his hair again and Steve sighed. He lifted his head and grabbed Howard's wrists. "If you keep tugging on my hair, I'm going to go bald. "

"Can't help it, you're driving me crazy, Steve."

"You like it when I drive you crazy."

He made a soft whining sound. "Come on, Steve. I'll blow you if you get me off quick. I know how much you love my mouth."

"Not tonight." Steve worried at his bottom lip and his ears turned red. "If you're not going to stop tugging on my hair, I… I'm going to tie your hands to the bedpost."

Howard closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and told himself, very firmly, that he was not going to come. Then he counted to twenty, in Latin, then German. When he could speak again, he said, his voice shaky, "I knew your fella was bad news."

I did tell you." Steve pulled Howard's hands up over his head.

He kept his eyes closed through the whole process. He couldn't… if he watched, he wouldn't last a second.

When Steve was done, he whispered in Howard's ear. "Comfortable?"

All Howard could do was nod.

Steve slowly undid Howard's belt and slid off his pants. Then he hooked his fingers under the waistband of Howard's underwear and tugged.

Howard's dick slapped wetly against his belly. Then nothing. Howard squirmed and opened his eyes. Steve was staring at him, just staring. "What are you waiting for?"

"That. I want you to look at me when I…" Steve ran a finger from the base of Howard's dick to the very tip.

He cursed and bucked his hips as pleasure shot through him.

"You know…" Steve swallowed hard. "You've used your mouth on me lots of times. But I've never… blown you."

"You don't have to. Steve, you don't…" The rest was cut off as Steve leaned down and licked a stripe up his dick.

"Fair's fair, Howard." He did it again and Howard let out a low, keening sound.

"God, Steve!" He rocked his hips. "Don't…. please! Please, just do it! I'll do anything you want if you just…. Just don't tease me!" If he hadn't been so eager for it, it would have been embarrassing.

Steve was a lot of things, but he wasn't a tease; Howard was damn glad about that. Howard's cock was gripped tightly in Steve's fist and… Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck!

He didn't think Steve would really do it. But there was no denying that the head of his dick was in Steve's mouth and Steve was…

Oh, God, Steve was sucking like he loved it. Sucking like he was a pro and he'd done this sort of thing a million times.

Howard tried not to buck, he really did, but he'd fantasized about this moment for months and here it was. It was better than he imagined it would be and Steve would probably chew him out later for cursing, but fuck, he couldn't stop. How could he when Steve was using his tongue like that?

He struggled to get better leverage; he just needed a bit more of Steve's hot mouth. It was frustrating. So damn frustrating. He was close. He just need a little more. Steve seemed to sense that because he sucked hard and Howard shattered into a million tiny pieces or maybe it just felt that way.

When his brain finally pieced itself together, he opened his eyes. Steve's mouth and chin were wet and Howard wanted to lick him clean. He also wanted to close his eyes again and fall asleep.

Steve straddled his hips and freed him from the bedpost without unbinding his hands. "Almost done."

He stared up at Steve, dazed. "What—"

Steve brought Howard's hands to his dick. "Touch me?"

Oh. It was awkward, but Steve didn't seem to care. He just watched as Howard rubbed and squeezed him. He just touched the tie he used to bind Howard and moaned. It didn't take long, just a half dozen strokes before be was spilling onto Howard's hands.

Then Steve untied him and tucked him in.

*****

“Can you get away for a few hours this afternoon,” Steve asked at breakfast a few weeks later. Like always, he was shoveling the food into his mouth as if it would disappear if it didn't.

Howard looked up from his coffee. “I think so. Why?”

“I want to show you something.” Steve smiled shyly.

He smiled back, he couldn’t help it. “All right.”

“Wear comfortable shoes.”

That should have been his first clue. Thirty minutes into the hike, he was sweaty, tired, and grumpy. He sighed and stumbled over a tree root. All he could think was that he could be in his lab doing something productive.

“We’re almost there, Howard. I promise.”

“You said that ten minutes ago.” He took off his tie and shoved it into his pocket.

“And I meant it ten minutes ago.” Steve reached over and took his hand.

“The things I do for you, Rogers.”

"You'll like this, I promise. Now come on."

Ten minutes later they were there in the middle of a field of wild flowers. Howard huffed, amusement and annoyance warring with each other. He turned to Steve and blinked in surprise. Steve seemed… transfixed.

“It’s like a painting,” Steve said and Howard realized that he’d probably never been out of the city in his life. He’d probably never seen places like this before now.

“It’s perfect,” he said. He thought, you’re perfect.

Steve found them a patch of grass to stretch out on and they stared up at the sky.

"So, I was thinking," Steve said, his voice soft and hesitant, "about after the war."

"What about it?”

"I don't know if you want to see me after we get home. "

Howard's first response was to say that of course he did, that they could find a way to make this work. But he realized that Steve deserved more consideration than a kneejerk response. He thought about it, really thought about it. Even if he and Steve kept seeing one another, he'd have to keep up appearances. Not only that, but he'd probably only get to see Steve a few times a month. Could Steve handle something like that? Steve was inexperienced, not just in relationships, but he knew nothing about Howard's world, about how it worked.

"I'd have to date. I'd be all over the social pages." He felt sick. He felt broken. "If anyone found out about us…"

"You'd be ruined." Steve's voice was even, there wasn't a hint of emotion; that stung him.

"So would you!" It came out harsher than he meant it to.

"I'm not rich or famous." Steve tried to smile.

"Why are you bringing this up now? It could be years before the war ends. We could have years."

Steve shrugged. "It's been on my mind for awhile."

"Well, what do you want to do?"

"What do you think I want?"

Howard sat up and ran his fingers through his hair. "I don't know! That's why I'm asking."

"Sometimes, when the guys are talking about their families and their girls back home, about how it's gonna be when they get back… I think about waking up next to you. I… I just think about you."

"Steve." Howard rubbed his face. "You make me feel like a coward."

"You're not. Howard, you're not. You've got more to lose, that's all." Steve reached over and touched his thigh. "It's okay if you can't."

Howard flopped back onto the grass and stared up at the sky. He thought about never seeing Steve again. He thought about living his life the way he always had. And he thought about the future and what it meant and what it could be. Then he thought about how it would feel to never see Steve again.

It would be like dying.

"Will you bring me breakfast in bed?"

Steve gave a shaky laugh. "And a newspaper. Every morning."

He reached over and placed his hand on Steve's. "I like orange marmalade."

Steve laced their fingers together and squeezed. "Me, too."

*****

"Stop moving so much, Howard."

"I have two of your fingers up my ass. I'll move if I want to. Fuck!"

"Howard—"

"I swear to God if you start lecturing me on my language, I'll leave. I'll get out of this bed and--" He cursed again as Steve did something with his fingers.

"I don't think you're going anywhere, Stark."

"You play dirty!" Smug bastard.

"You bet."

*****

Quiet evenings were getting more rare as the weeks went by and Howard felt as if they were rushing towards some sort of explosive culmination. He only hoped that would mean the end of the war.

He sat at his workbench, trying to pry open a burnt out casing. He thought that maybe he was fighting a losing battle. Steve sat on the bed, needle and thread in hand, as he fixed a few holes in his costume.

"Howard?"

"Hmm?" Blowtorch? Hammer? Maybe he could get Steve to give it a try.

"You… You really liked it when I… t-tied you up that night."

Howard carefully set down the casing and looked at Steve who was concentrating very hard on the stitching of his costume. "I did. So did you."

"Yeah." Steve's ears turned red. "One of the guys, he has these magazines. Special magazines. A lot of it made me…"

"Excited?"

Steve looked up. "Uncomfortable. But then I thought… what if you like that sort of thing."

Howard didn't know whether to be amused or offended. "Because I let you tie me up?"

"And other stuff. You… you like it rough and that night at the pub with the girls, there were two of them. And…" Steve's face was getting progressively redder. "I know you liked it when I... You know, on your face."

"You said that was an accident."

"It was!"

"What's the problem here, Steve? Are you mad because I like a little variety?"

"No, I just… I don't want you to be bored."

Howard did not sigh. This was what he got for seducing a virgin. Or allowing himself to be seduced by one. He was still trying to figure out which.

He got up, went over to Steve and pushed the costume away before straddling Steve's lap. "You're right, I like all those things, but not because I'm getting bored with you, Steve. They're fun. Aren't there things you'd like to try?"

Steve shrugged and stared at some point above Howard's shoulder. Getting Steve to talk about sex, even when they were in the middle of sex, could be like trying to wring blood out of a stone.

Howard ran his fingers through Steve's hair and kissed him. "Steve, I love being with you. I love it when we pet and I love having your dick my mouth and your fingers in my ass. I love kissing you and touching you. And yeah, I love it when you're rough. I loved it when you hold me down. But Steve, the things I let you do to me, they're not things I've done a lot."

"They're not?"

"No. I let you do them to me because I trust you. I'd let you do anything to me, Steve."

"Because you trust me. Because you… " Steve swallowed hard. "You… You like it when I tell you what to do."

"Do I?"

"Yeah, you get this look on your face, sort of… dreamy. " Steve brushed his thumb against Howard's lips. "Sometimes I think I could tell you to jump off a bridge and you would."

He smiled and kissed Steve's thumb. "Does that make you excited?"

"That scares me. I wouldn't hurt you. I'd never hurt you. I'd never make you do anything you didn't want to do." Steve looked desperate, frightened almost.

"I know, Steve. I know." Howard kissed him gently, trying to soothe him. "What is it? What's got you so worried?"

"One of the pictures. I… I can't get it out of my head. I can't stop thinking about it. About doing it to you."

"What do you think about doing to me that could be so bad?"

"Hitting you."

Howard was off Steve's lap before he could fully process the words. "H-hitting me?"

Steve's shoulders were slumped and he was staring at his lap. He looked miserable.

"What do you mean, hit me? You want to punch me?"

Steve jerked his head up, his eyes wide. "No! I'd never… It wasn't. She… the girl in the picture… She was getting… spanked. Like a kid."

Spanked? Howard almost laughed. "Steve, that's… You had me worried there."

"It's… I'd never hit you!"

"Steve there's a big difference between hitting someone who enjoys it and hitting someone who doesn't." He walked over to his cabinet and took out his whiskey and a glass.

"If it's no big deal, then why are you upset?"

"I'm not upset." He poured himself a double.

"You're lying."

"I'm not lying."

"Howard, you always drink whiskey when you're upset."

He stared at the glass in his hand. "That's not true."

"Yeah, it is," Steve said, gently.

Howard's hand shook slightly. After a moment, he put the bottle back and set his drink on the worktable. Then he sat down on the bed.

Steve put a hand on his. "Tell me why you jumped off me when I mentioned hitting you."

He pulled his hand away from Steve's. "Did you mom ever hit you when you were a kid?"

Steve shrugged. "I got swatted on the backside once or twice. I was sick a lot so I didn't get into much trouble."

He smiled "That doesn't surprise me. I was a trouble-maker."

"You still are, Howard."

"Yeah, well, the military makes it easy to break the rules. And there are so many of them." Howard stared at his hands. "Spare the rod, spoil the child, that was my parents' philosophy. Of course, my dad… He's a great inventor and a great businessman. But he's a drunk and he's been a drunk for as long as I can remember. And he's a mean drunk."

"He hit you."

"More than a few swats on the backside. He'd… When I was twelve, he broke my nose. My mother told him that if he ever touched me again, that she would take me and go home to her parents."

Steve touched his shoulder. "He stopped?"

"What do you think?" He looked at Steve. "I mean, come on, Steve, you know me. You know how I can be. I've tried your patience more than a few times, and you're practically a saint."

"Don’t do that, Howard. Don't make excuses for him."

"I’m not."

"You are and you don't have to. I don't care how bad you think you were, he shouldn’t have beat you. He was bigger than you and stronger than you and you didn't deserve that, no one deserves that." He touched Howard's cheek. "I know how it feels and it doesn't make me think less of you. It wasn't your fault. Okay?"

Howard took a deep breath and blinked rapidly. "Okay."

"I'll never hurt you. I promise that I'll never hurt you. And I won't let anyone else hurt you either." Steve kissed him.

"Thanks." Howard nuzzled his mouth. "But no one can keep promises like that, Steve. Not even you."

"The hell I can't."

It was getting to be too much and he felt that if he didn't do something, say something, to lighten the mood, he might explode. "So, spanking, huh?"

Steve looked away. "It was only a stupid thought. I don't… need it."

"I know you don't need it. But Steve, what you saw in the picture, it's something people enjoy and it's okay to enjoy it." He tugged on Steve's hair, "I trust you and I want to try."

Steve bit his bottom lip, then stared at Howard for a long moment. "You'll tell me if you want to stop."

"Immediately, I promise." He crossed his heart.

"Not today. I have to… I have to think about it for awhile."

"No, not today." Howard pushed Steve onto his back. "Now, tell me, Captain Rogers, how do you feel about being tied up?"

Steve gave an exasperated look. "I could probably break free of anything you used to tie me up."

He smiled. "Now that's a challenge I like."

*****

"Are you sure about this, Howard?" Steve was shuffling his feet; he looked like a little boy who had just done something wrong. Well, except that Steve was naked.

"For the millionth time, yes." He stepped out of his underwear and gestured for Steve to come closer.

Steve took a few steps closer. "It's just sometimes I forget my own strength."

"You're not going to hurt me." He bridged the distance between them and took Steve's hand. "Now relax. This is supposed to be fun."

"Okay." Steve took a few deep breaths and pulled Howard in for a kiss. "I'll stop any time you want."

"I know." He stepped back and watched as Steve sat on the bed.

After a few moments, he laid across Steve's lap. He took a few deep breaths of his own and forced his muscles to relax. "I'm ready."

Steve gently stroked his ass, then brought his hand down lightly.

Howard rolled his eyes. "Come on, soldier, that swat wouldn't have hurt a fly."

"I'm building up to it."

"Build faster." He tensed slightly when the next one came down. That one stung a little. Steve paused and he said, "Go on."

Steve brought his hand down again, several times, and each time, Howard tensed. Each time Howard's stomach clenched and he had to fight the urge to say stop. But he didn't. This was for Steve; he could do this.

He tensed, waiting for the next one, but it didn't come. "What are you waiting for?"

"You're grinding your teeth."

"No, I'm not." He relaxed his jaw.

"Yeah, you were. Come on, sit up." Steve manhandled him onto the bed.

"What about my spanking?"

"You weren't enjoying it and neither was I."

"That’s not true!"

Steve crossed his arms over his chest and just looked at Howard patiently.

"All right, so I wasn't enjoying it, per say. But I'm willing to… to…"

"Let me do something to you that you don’t like."

When Steve said it that way, it sounded a little silly. He sighed. "I just want you to be happy."

"I am happy. I'm happy doing things we both like." Steve pounced on him and soon Howard was stretched out on his back, his hands pinned above his head, "Your.. um… little soldier likes it too."

Little soldier. He gave Steve a pained look.

Steve just licked Howard's mouth and smiled. "I'm gonna blow you. I want you to keep your hands over your head while I do. If you don't, I'm gonna punish you."

"What are you going to do, glare at me?"

"No, I’m gonna make you walk out into the middle of camp and give me twenty push ups. Twenty *perfect* push ups."

Howard grinned. "You're on."

*****

Captain America was a dirty, rotten bastard. That's all Howard had to say about the whole push up incident.


End file.
